He's cheating and I want revenge

[tmj4477]

Okay I so know my husband is cheating and I have the emails to prove it (thanks to a webwatcher program). I want to send him emails under a alias address; however, I dont want him to know that I have his email password and be able to track me via IP address through email (he's works in intelligence and his friends are IT's). Basically I want him to squirm and be uncomfortable for a while. How can I hide or change my IP address? Or do I have to have someone else send the email from a separate location?

[clanmills]

Hi TMJ

I think you're moving in the wrong direction - and I think I know why! You're treating this as a technical issue, however this is a human relationship problem.

If you believe your husband is cheating, you should raise the subject in a calm manner and express your concerns and fears. The action you are proposing here is not open and honest and when he discovers what you've been doing, he'll use this to justify his bad/dishonest behavior.

So please consider an honest open approach. Ask him to come with you to a marriage councilor. The IT Help desk (this forum) is poorly skilled to help you resolve your issues.

I hope you find a solution and happiness.

[wimiadmin]

TMJ,

I agree with clanmills in that you're moving in the wrong direction.

I saw the IP you're coming from and as much as I can sympathize with what you're going through, I would refrain from researching / posting about this subject while at work. I use to work for a very similar department and know what the IT folks are monitoring for when reviewing web surfing records. You certainly don't want to jeopardize anything with your career over this matter.

You say you've got proof via emails so in situations like this, you have to make a choice. Either approach the subject directly and get counseling together or be the bigger person and move on with your life. Making him squirm sure sounds like a good idea, but in the end it's too much of a burden on every day life and it would be a better investment of your time to focus on yourself and the decisions you need to make.

Although there are methods to hide your IP address, I'm certain that none of them are 100%. You can send emails from Gmail without being traced directly, but someone at Google will have the originating IP and with a few cooperative inquiries with Google, he could possibly learn where they're coming from and trace it right back to you.

[SE7EN]

I agree with both of these people. It is a human issue and should be dealt with physically rather than logically. But if you must do this you could use a coffee-shop connection and further spoof your IP and change your laptop's mac address for the occasion if you really wanted to be secretive. To spoof your IP you would use a proxy that supports ssl/http for the web mail email you would be using. This is all very secure and fail-safe because with a changed mac address you would be completely blocking out your identity. To further protect yourself you could also use a different browser which would register differently on Google's server so that if this guy does work for Google or have connections there then he's stuck once again.

I have done multiple tracking and spying for husband/wife issues such as this one but yet I still believe that physical action is more appropriate. The truth of the matter is that the internet is creating relationships and destroying them at the same time.

Hope this helps; if you need more assistance I will try and guide you in a correct direction

[AboveTheLogic]

just go to the library to send the emails, and while you're there have a look at the relationship counseling books

[Scrittore]

Originally Posted by tmj4477

Okay I so know my husband is cheating and I have the emails to prove it (thanks to a webwatcher program). I want to send him emails under a alias address; however, I dont want him to know that I have his email password and be able to track me via IP address through email (he's works in intelligence and his friends are IT's). Basically I want him to squirm and be uncomfortable for a while. How can I hide or change my IP address? Or do I have to have someone else send the email from a separate location?

Some have counseled you to confront your husband in hopes of recovering your marriage. While any steps necessary to save a marriage that can be saved are worthwhile, two things out of three are just as likely to happen pursuant to the confrontation.

(1) He goes "underground" after assuring you he will not repeat the action, drop the illicit partner, etc., and just be more careful next time
(2) He really does repent but you can't get past his infidelity or wondering if he is thinking of "the other woman" every time he touches you

The third, the marriage is saved, you forgive, he regrets his actions, and you both live happily ever after.

May it be so - but if not possible - to email him anonymously, set up an account at SwissMail.org from which to send your emails (forget the library, they will take your ID and you cannot hide your IP address emailing from there so if your husband is computer-savy or has a friend that is, you will likely be unmasked).

The most affordable arrangement from SwissMail allows you to have three aliases so you can REALLY keep him off balance until you are finally ready to take him down.

Best of success

Scrittore